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Ephemeral Stream Recordings

Middle Mattress Chasm

by Sucker Crush

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about

ESR is proud to present the debut studio offering from Sucker Crush, the solo songwriting project of Oakland-based musician/composer Marissa Deitz. "Middle Mattress Chasm" is a concise reflection on loss and the deadweight of intimacy, as Deitz processes the end of her marriage and creative partnership. She refracts the pain of loss into warm textures, delicate artifacts, and moments of self reclamation that levitate in this short and graceful handful of songs. Tapes and downloads are available August 25th.

credits

released August 25, 2018

Marissa Deitz - voice, guitar, cello, keys
Nate Wheeler - percussion, keys
Mateo Lugo - voice, guitar
Adam Hirsch - voice, clarinet, keys
Joy Cyr - voice, percussion

Songs by Marissa Deitz
Recorded by Adam Hirsch
at Tiny Telephone Recording in San Francisco, CA
Mastered by Geoff Saba
at Itinerant Home Recordings

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all rights reserved

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about

Sucker Crush Oakland, California

Oakland-based femmecore dreampop sad summer ballads and midnight breakup songs

booking:
suckercrushbooking@gmail.com

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Track Name: Be Well
I want you to be well
I want this to be everything
we thought we wanted then
back when we wed

we gave all ourselves
I saw things in the whitest light
and darkest parts of you
and I feel it too

sometimes we try
sometimes we fail
this time we tried

please be kind to yourself
please believe me
if only as the one who took your name
even in vain
Track Name: Clementine
on another sleepless night
I stand underwater close my eyes
anxious, paralyzed
please don’t go to bed
please don’t go

you’re several bottles deep
something flickers on the screen
aching between my knees
please don’t go to bed
please don’t go

please darling reach for me, speak
please darling reach for me

across the table I
watch your fingers peel a clementine
hungry, but you’re not mine
please don’t go to bed
please don’t go
Track Name: Apt E
darling look for me, back in the place where we
built a life and spent our days, lost our love and parted ways
this isn't how I thought our fated love would go
tried to be one and the same in the broken home we made

you're gone longer every day

I saw you off that day, touch you before you go
gazed into your tired eyes, saw all the wasted days inside
and still I glance for you smoking on sidewalks
where you’d go to be alone, I’d listen for you coming home

you're gone longer every day

I wish the best for you out on the other coast
with your longing lady dove and the city in your skin
but I won't wait for you, or let my lonesome bones
fall into another's hold, I will to do this on my own

I'm gone longer every day
Track Name: Pity Party
I don’t really want you to be mine anymore
even when it’s good I feel like I’ve gone overboard
I don’t really want you to be mine anymore
I don’t want to be defined as a wife at 24

it's dawning on my now you’re no good for me
it's not enough that I love you
you’re everything that I’ve been waiting for
and too much more

I don’t really want you to be mine anymore
I don’t want to be a part of your pity party anymore

your anger’s never cause enough
to treat me any less than kindly
I know you’re hurting darling I feel you
but fuck you too

I don’t really want you to be mine anymore
I don’t want to live this kind of a life anymore

we tried to wish it all away
but god it doesn’t work that way
you’re hurting me and I’ll admit this too
I can’t heal you

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